The Things We Don’t Talk About

If you’ve met me, seen me on social platforms, or read the posts here, you will know that I am *very* open about my struggles with mental health. What’s become so clear to me, especially over the past year, is that I really am far from alone in this.

That knowledge presents me with a massive dichotomy. On the one hand I find it reassuring and liberating. On the other it frightens me, as the scale of the issue far exceeds what many people realise. I also find it frightening just how many people feel that they cannot talk about it.

Which got me thinking, what are the other things that we don’t talk about? How about accessibility and disability? Or learning differences? What about diversity and inclusion? When do people talk about religion? Not in a preachy way, but simply in a “I feel excluded from events because they conflict with the way I live out my faith”?

The things we don’t talk about are often the very things we SHOULD be talking about… but we don’t. We can feel lesser because of them. They can make us feel flawed and damaged. We can feel ostracised and secluded by our own thoughts or by the culture surrounding us.

And so, with all this running around my head, I resolved to talk about the things we don’t talk about. To try to break down walls and to remove some of the stigmas. To give strength and reassurance to people who sit in silent struggles, and to shine a light so we can all become aware of what surrounds us.

After talking it through with my good friend Alison Mulligan (@amulligan365 on twitter) we came up with a podcast concept and name, with the two of us co-hosting and presenting, and then… nothing.

Life hit me hard last year. 2020 was a massive kick in the teeth for many people, and so it was for me in many ways. I’m actually writing this on the first anniversary of a much loved aunts death. She was 5 years older than me and we were very close.

I also ended up in hospital with the very realistic prospect of losing the use of everything below my waist – a couple of millimeters was how close it was. Lockdown & covid drove me close to the point of nervous breakdown (thanks to The Bespoke Badger and other groups for being there!)

In it all we did manage to do some recordings. With some great episodes recorded, “The Things We Don’t Talk About” podcast launched with a teaser episode just before Christmas and the first “proper” episode has JUST GONE LIVE.

Available on all your favourite podcast platforms (more to be added as we get established) and on YouTube as well! So you can listen, watch, tune in wherever you want.

Our hope in launching this is that it has some impact and manages to help out. If each episode makes just one person feel less alone, helps them to feel stronger and more at peace, then that to me is a massive success.

If we manage to break down barriers, smash stigmas, and get conversations out in the open… that would change the lives of so many people.

I hope you take a listen to the podcast, watch the videos, and take part in the change. When you do listen, please subscribe and share far and wide. We want this to help as many people as possible and to really be a catalyst for driving conversations that wouldn’t normally happen.

There is also a page here (under construction) where I’ll be posting links, articles, follow-ups and all sorts of things related to the podcasts.

Above all, just know that you are not alone. You don’t have to struggle in silence. These are the things we don’t talk about, but the things that we should talk about.